from the Word

Pour out your heart like water before the face of the LORD. Lift your hands toward Him for the life of your young children. - Lamentations 2.19

In the fear of the LORD one has strong confidence and his children have a refuge. - Prov. 14.26

three down...

Just a quick update...

Waylon is growing like a weed. He is three months old now and...
sleeping through the night
laughing
'talking' (his favorite words are ohhh, mmm, and ooo)
blowing bubbles
smiling back at us
holding his head up
rolling onto his side
finding his hands and grabbing
squirming, dancing, exercising, moving a LOT
loving music, especially my singing ;)

He's pretty amazing, to say the least. I try to tell him all day long. That and 'I love you.' He loves to hear those things. Doesn't everyone? The best part of my day..well, there are actually two. The first is first thing in the morning, when I go to get Dub out of bed. I peer down at him and he gives me this groggy, confused look, rubs his little eyes and as soon as he realizes it's me and it's a new day, he gives me the biggest smile. Nothing has ever made me feel more loved. He loves me with his whole heart. He can't imagine a better Mama and those heart-tingles feel like more than all the money in the world. And he stretches so hard in the morning. Ready for a new day. The other best part is when Joey gets home. Usually, we are in the kitchen cooking dinner. Waylon sits in this rocker on the counter and watches me. When Joey comes in, he goes immediately to Waylon and the little guy lights up. He loves his Daddy and gets so tickeled when he sees him for the first time all day long. It is precious. There are few things I'd rather see and hear than Joey and Waylon together. I love those boys.

Joey and I have decided that now is as good a time as any to do a grown-up budget. After 4 1/2 hours on Sunday, we finally turned that new leaf over. First of all, I'd like to thank Dave Ramsey. If you don't know who he is, look him up. He will change your life. Second, I love Joey more now than I did on Saturday. There is something about the intimacy of budgeting (yes, intimacy) that has opened our hearts to each other a little more than they were. This is going to be good. Check back in a few months. I could have other things to say.

This afternoon has been bliss. My Christmas tree has provided the ideal amount of glow on this dim, wintry day. The Duggars are on t.v. Waylon is on the baby monitor. My coffe is hot and my dark chocolate is working its magic. I wrapped my first Christmas present this morning and started to mail a few Christmas cards before I realized it's barely December. I'll wait.

'Teach God's words to your children, talking about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road.' Deut 11:19a
'Stand still and see this great thing the Lord is about to do before your eyes.' 1Sam 12:16

Stay tuned.

rule 1: there are no rules

I promise this could be so much easier. As far as I'm concerned, the world is pretty much black and white. Things are either one way or another. There is no room for gray. That being said, I love a rule. They are very comfortable to me. I am convinced that if there were a rule book for parenting, it would be a breeze. I know there are lots of suggestion books. And ultimately, I am striving to be a Godly parent more than anything - to love unconditionally and discipline in that love among other things. But, what I mean is a 'do this, don't do that,' 'this will lead to this,' 'a+b=c' kind of book. I need to know exactly what to do! I need to be able to enter what I am currently doing into a computer and have it tell me what I'm doing right and what I'm doing wrong and how to fix it. I need RULES! I told Joey just the other day, this is just one big, life-long problem-solving puzzle. For real. Something happens, so you try one thing. If it works, you win! If it doesn't, you try something else. Lather, rinse, repeat. It's crazy! I ask lots of moms lots of questions and dang if every one of them gives me a different answer to the same question. When this is all said and done, maybe I'll write the rule book. If only one book would work for every child. Oh well.

for real this time

we made it to church yesterday morning. we're those 8 o'clock people. waylon did great. slept through the whole thing, which is really incredible because if you've ever been to church of the highlands, you know that it is about as quiet as...something. a really loud concert in a closed arena. i mean, it is loud. as a matter of fact, it hurts my hears sometimes. i don't know how he did it. there are times when the message alert on my phone or a little sniffle wakes him up. maybe he was asleep in the spirit. by the way, speaking of hurting my ears, i told joey that i have to unfocus my ears when things hurt them like that. he didn't know what i was talking about. you know? how you can sort of tighten something in your head and whatever was hurting your ears is suddenly not so loud anymore? same thing i do when W is doing that tongue-curling, tonsel-rattling, this-must-be-death scream. joey has to put him down and walk away. me? i just unfocus my ears. come to find out, my ears move when i do it, so it must be like wiggling your ears. try it. if you're doing it right, there will be a little white noise, much like the ocean in your head. peaceful.

anyway, there was a guest speaker at church, which i was not excited about. not that 'chris hodges is my homeboy.' as a matter of fact, there are some things he says that i don't necessarliy agree with and mom and i recently discovered that he is actually recycling stories. slack. but usually the guest speakers are tremendously less interesting and often even more disagreeable. but, yesterday's guy was fantastic. he was dynamic and funny and not that loud...and he had some good, biblically-sound things to say. his message was on giving. i am now fully convinced that the holy spirit speaks directly to me during sermons about giving. true confession: i don't. give, that is. i want to more than you know. but for some reason, well actually lots of made up, shallow reasons, i don't. things like: we're on one salary now and things are tight; i will when i have some extra money; i know i have extra money, but i really need another puffy vest/pair of boots/jacket/fill-in-the-blank. there are lots of them. i have extensive conversations with myslef about wanting and needing to give and why i don't. what's funny, and this is not official, but i'm pretty sure gift-giving is one of my 'love languages.' i really love buying christmas and birthday gifts that are thoughtful and meaningful (yet inexpensive). i love love purging my things and giving them away (so there is more room to buy new things, no doubt). i have been on several mission trips (the kind where 'you get more than the people you came to serve') where i've visited nursing homes and mental health clinics, ghettos and homeless shelters and african villages so remote they didn't make the map. i've shown up with warm coats and hot food, inspiring songs and hopeful words, modern medicine and friendly smiles and hugs. i have given lots to lots of people who need. but for some reason, i have never tithed. that's right NEVER. i don't know why. i always wanted to have my own personalized offering envelopes, but never did.
the sermon, more or less, reitterated the fact that GOd blesses abundantly those who give, not just tithe. he talked about the difference between tithing and giving: tithing is returning to God what is His anyway; giving is in addition to tithing. so, i'm for real this time. i really am ready to act on my convictions. joey and i are so blessed. i mean we have a LOT of stuff, not necessarily high-dollar, super valuble stuff. but we have a lot. way more than we need and really more than we want. we are always talking about cleaning out and purging our hoards. well, this time i'm for real. i'm ready to give it away..and then some. more than that, i am so ready to tithe. i don't know what to do about all that i have kept from God over the years by not tithing. i feel so guilty about that (i guess that's conviction). i'm ready to live a new life with less me and more God..and more other people. hold me to it.

so you don't have to imagine...

This is still my favorite picture of Waylon so far.

Waylon and his Lolly.

He is such a serious little man.

This is my favorite picture of my boys so far. Waylon is so tiny and he's looking straight into the camera. Precious.

These are some of my favorites. It takes about an hour to upload this many pictures on my super-efficient computer, so I will add more later.

with two feet

i have never wanted anything the way i wanted to be a mom. it has been a part of me forever. it took a year for 'the time to be right'. it was one of those years. we'll talk more about that later...
waylon james got here on september 6 at 4.45 in the afternoon. dubya. dub.
he is more wonderful than all my day dreams ever were. it is exactly as amazing as i always knew it would be.
i said this wouldn't be one of those mom blogs where all i write about is my baby. we'll see...
i do know one thing. i am living my dream.
this is the beginning of something huge.